Expensive shirt before train back to Pingguo and meal with Boss Hu

There was no particular plan for today, so we got up lateish and moped around the room getting our things ready. The kids had left sweets and biscuits everywhere and it was quite messy. Also the towels hadn't dried from last night so I had to dry myself with not much more than a facecloth after my shower. Only around midday did we finally arrange to check out. A Wu had left at 8.30am apparently - he'd been called to do some business at a local hotel. So I called him and he got Driver to pick me and the boys up, the girls begrudgingly accepting to take Xixi with them.

We went to a posh hotel with a huge foyer, and found A Wu, with Er Jie and rich uncle, the same three who had delayed our departure for Nanning yesterday. They had had a bit to eat, and now Er Jie and rich uncle were leaving. As it was lunchtime I ordered some stuff for us and we had a reasonably civilised meal in rather splendid surroundings. We were just about to leave when my tummy sent a signal that it would require the accompaniment of a "ma tong" (sit down toilet) within four minutes. I thought it much safer to seek refuge in such a hotel than risk a squatter elsewhere. I was relieved to see a disabled cubicle in the men's bogs and sure enough it was the only shitter with a sitter. And I had no phone reception either so I enjoyed ten minutes all to myself - almost worth the price of admission on its own.

A Wu had told me he was going to buy me an item of clothing. Whether this was just a friendly thing to do or a comment on my existing wardrobe I didn't ask. We got in the car and as we were leaving the hotel a security guard knocked on the window and we had to pay 15 kuai to get out. Scandalous that a paying customer has to pay to park in the hotel he's spent so much money in!

We drove to a shopping centre close to where we were yesterday and visited a few clothes shops, A Wu asking me to try on various shirts. Typically they were too small, and we had a bit of a laugh at that. In each shop, the ladies (always ladies) poured us cups of tea and offered us and the kids sweets. I nearly went for a top in one place but they said they only had a size 52, which was a bit tight on the shoulders, and it would take 20 minutes to get a size 54 delivered. A Wu was having none of that so we spent half an hour looking around and ended up at a previous place that did have a blue flowery shirt that fitted me ok. A Wu voiced his approval, and that we would take it. Then I saw the price tag and was aghast. 2580 kuai, or 250 quid. A Wu took out some dark blue envelope that must have been some sort of voucher. He "paid" for the shirt and seemed quite happy that there was still 5000+ kuai on it. Now it is a nice shirt, but there is no way it is worth 10% of its price tag, and I'd love to know exactly what was going on. I know that when you do buy things you get vouchers for future purchase but this seemed excessive - I even wondered if there was some sort of money-laundering happening.

Tightly parked dian dong ches lining the streets outside the shopping centre

Well, the lady took my Man City shirt and put it in a bag as I was to wear the most expensive item of clothing I have ever owned for the rest of the day. A Wu then said he wanted to buy a new phone. Despite its old-fashioned looks, I've been impressed by his phone of the last couple of years; it takes two SIM cards (as so many do over here) and the battery lasts ages. But of course he went straight to the iphone stand. Well, not quite straight - I told him about the Galaxy 3S, and that it was newer than the iphone, and may have certain advantages, but then stopped in my tracks. I'd have to get geeky to show how it might be better and when people have this iphone look in their eyes it's worse than any rose-tinted spectacles. They just want one and that's it. It's a great phone, no doubt. It's just the way it zombifies people that puts me off a little.

Anyway, I didn't have time to stay with him. After the journey down I didn't want a repeat of the lack of safety and discomfort on the way back so Leilei and I were to take the train. It transpired that he wanted to stay with A Da, but by that time the women had joined us in the mobile phone emporium, and Xixi was more than willing to go back with me. It was 3pm and I had already checked the timetable and the next train was at 4.20pm so we were told to hurry and get a taxi to the train station.

It took longer than expected to find a taxi, and we crawled all the way to the station, arriving at 4pm. I realised we needed to rush a little so we found the shorted queue and waited patiently. I lost my patience soon after as the bloke at the front of the queue seemed incapable of understanding the ticket seller, despite the fact I could. I felt like translating to him as he couldn't decide whether to buy a single or return ticket. I guessed it might be quicker to move to another queue, so did, and was promptly followed by a couple of other people. This queue moved faster, but I was slightly concerned that people were waving their id cards while purchasing tickets. Finally at gone 4.10pm we were at the front of the queue. I asked if there were seats on the next train to Pingguo, and was answered in the negative. I thought about it for three seconds before realising I didn't have much of a choice so I ordered two singles to Pingguo, but the woman looked at Xixi and asked if she needed a ticket. I said I didn't know, and that she was four years old. But I was asked if she was over 1m20cm tall. I took a glance at her, with literally no clue, and said she was surely under 1m20cm. That meant she was free, but the teller needed my id card. Ah damn, I said I didn't have one but she said a passport would do. I said I didn't have that but I did have the number (I keep a text file of such important info in my phone). She said she needed the document but I had no time to argue and showed her the number on my screen and said "this is the number you need!" in my best Derren Brown Mandarin. She calmly complied, took down the number and printed off my ticket.

We had to run to security and put Xixi's new strawberry bag that A Wu had bought her yesterday through the screening machine. I asked if I needed to take out my mobile from my pocket and was told no, only to fail the person-screening machine and have a metal detector search and find my mobile. Why didn't they just let me take it out in the first place? The train was boarding so we ran to the first gate where my ticket was checked and we were allowed into the waiting room. Then we needed to exit the waiting room and this time the ticket inspector told me the ticket was wrong. I said it wasn't as I'd checked when I bought it but true enough I'd been sold a ticket for the later 8.55pm train.

Thinking on my feet I said surely I could get on the train and then pay for a new ticket there. Surprisingly the guard said I could and let us through, where we ran to the first carriage that wasn't a sleeper (as this was an overnight train going to Kunming). There was yet another guard at the door of the carriage and I explained that we would pay once on board. He looked fairly friendly and said "ok" so we got on. I feared the worse when I saw many people sitting down in the aisles between the carriages, and others standing in the same area. I didn't fancy doing that for the journey with Xixi so we got ourselves into a carriage and actually found a seat, understanding that someone would come and claim it soon. But no-one did. We didn't chat that much to the others as I was very tired and I tried to get some shuteye because we'd be going for a meal 90 minutes later with Boss Hu.

There were actually a couple of spare seats, but none of the non-seated people seemed interested. Then another guard came and started asking everyone where we were going, and then writing it down on a pad for some reason. I asked the bloke next to me if Pingguo was the next stop and he said it was. An hour later we arrived at Long An, but I thought better than to say anything. Xixi was more-or-less ok for the journey, though got a bit heavy and sweaty on my lap as the air-con was fairly feeble. No other guards came to us to ask us to pay anything so I was glad that a bit of common sense and politeness helped us out.

When we got out at Pingguo we opted to take the bus into town, rather than a san lun che, which, to my regret would have been quicker and only a few kuai more expensive, as the bus went the long way around to the centre. The driver didn't have change for a 10 kuai note so told us to wait until more people got on. He thought I had a fiver and when I gave him the tenner after three more people had got on he said "oh!", whatever that meant. When we got off I tried to force him to take the 10 kuai but with a smile he wouldn't accept it. Then we ended up getting a san lun che home anyway as it would have been a hot few minutes' walk otherwise. I'd called Boss Hu and knew where to go so after a quick freshening up Xixi and I got on the dian dong che to the university area. We didn't have to wait that long for A Wu and the other entourage to turn up from Nanning.

The meal was in another new hotel and there was just us lot who had gone to Nanning and Boss Hu. The food was excellent, and Hu was pretty quick on the beers, gan bei'ing at a frequency hitherto unseen outside of a karaoke room. Despite her tiredness, Tan managed a couple of gan beis too and got into the spirit of things. We originally had tiny strong alcohol glasses literally the size of a thimble and huge wine glasses. I told Hu that I didn't drink white alcohol because it tasted dreadful and stank, preferring beer, at which point he told the young ladies to bring beer glasses in. A while later, during the meal, he presented me with a gift of an expensive boxed bottle of white alcohol. I was rather embarrassed, but as we'd had a few bevvies I was actually also quite happy to have been given such a present. However, white alcohol is a bit of a white elephant here as if I bring it back it will impact what I can buy from duty-free - I'm thinking I could have it as an exhibit in our house here as at 56% it's not likely to go off in a hurry.

Boss Hu, a present of bai jiu, and me in a very expensive new shirt

I'd noticed, after eating enough, that Hu couldn't seem to stop eating, even using his hands to take food from the serving plates, which I imagined was not really done. I hadn't kept up with his drinking either. Driver then took the kids to Waipo's to play, and the ladies left a little later to "wash feet". One of A Wu's colleagues turned up to help eat and drink the rest of what was there before the four of us blokes also got driven to the Ming Dian hotel to have our feet done.

"Washing feet" is actually a rather accurate description of what is done here, at least for the first 20 minutes. We had a room with four bed-like couches, each with its own lady and wooden bucket of hot water with herbs, which we dipped our feet into. It was a relaxing experience and I managed to withstand the heat of the water unlike last time. Within the time it took me to get my feet and legs aclimatised to the temperature I heard a deep snoring coming from Boss Hu to my left. To his left A Wu was also fast asleep. Now I was tired, but not quite enough to sleep, especially as I didn't want to miss this, but all in all it was 90 minutes of luxury - half an hour or so of the feet before a massage for the rest of the time. I found myself dropping off from time to time during the massage, but got roused by Tan popping her head in and asking if I could go and pick up the kids. What was she on about? She had finished and I had half an hour to go, as if I'd just walk away now! No, darling you pick them up and I'll see to them a little later....

We left some time gone 11pm, after A Wu had argued enough at the reception and managed not to pay (was he owed something? I'll never know), and I got a lift to pick up the kids, shower them and get them into bed, having a relatively early night myself.