I'd been told I was going to be the main driver, but then Tan said I would drive the 2nd car as it was very important that the car carrying the groom doesn't stop at any time as this would be bad luck. Ok. So Chinese have supernatural control over traffic lights that I just don't have.
Don't stop the car!
Anyway, my car had been left in our complex's car park with the passenger's window down so the right-hand side was soaking. I had to start the car by turning off the alarm and turning on the sidelights before turning the key - apparently that is the norm here. I drove to the florists where A Wu and I waited an hour for our cars to be befitted with flowers and other decorations in the pouring rain. They couldn't do more than one at a time as there was only one gazebo to cover a car. I was starving by this point but I needn't have worried.
We went to A Ni's house, where her half brother and his wife already live, and made some final preparations to the cars before driving to the bride's real house where she was waiting. Apparently the custom is to beg the bride to come with you to your house - and you tell her there will be great food etc. As it turned out there was great food in her house so the entourage (4 car loads plus about 40 people in her house) all sat down to eat first lunch at about 10.30am. I managed a couple of small glasses of rice alcohol which didn't go down brilliantly but I had to join in, and anyway I was at the centre table with the bride.
After the meal we took most of the people back to A Ni's house in the cars, including a pickup truck to take the presents that included a washing machine and a new bed. The men set to work on taking apart the newly-weds' existing bed that looked perfectly new and in tip-top condition, and then constructing the 'new' bed, which was certainly second-hand. Unfortunately, they didn't have instructions and this looked more complicated than its Ikea equivalent. I think it was a question of too many cooks spoiling the broth, and none of them wanting to lose face. After a long time I stepped into the middle of the half-constructed bed and explained, calmly and slowly, using two pieces of wood at right-angles as an example, how the rest needed to be set up. Amazingly they actually stopped and listened to me - most of the people had never seen me before and probably were shocked that I could speak the lingo. Or maybe they couldn't understand a word but were being respectful. Either way, ten minutes later the bed was completed and I congratulated them on a good job (management skills entail more than just getting the job done).
I had spent enough time in the newly-weds' room (basically they live in a room, like A Wu and A Ni, and like we did two years ago). I was a bit tired of the huge 12' high poster of the newly-weds covering one whole wall of their living quarters. It looked like some 80s advert for whisky or something. Tan said we could get one done for 100 kuai (under a tenner), then I reminded her that it would be hard to fit into our suitcases. Can you imagine the shame of walking into your friends house and seeing photos of them twice their real size smiling down at you like some virgin mary gone wrong?
Sorting stuff out in the newly-weds' room with a poster of them in the background
I crept up to the top floor where I found a number of the older generation either cooking (if they were female) or talking/smoking/waiting for food (if they were male). This was a great experience. The women wouldn't let me help (must be their culture - I didn't want to interfere), but the men were happy to talk to me, even if I couldn't understand most of what they said. One old man seemed to be talking in tongues in front of the 'alter' for one of the dead ancestors. It was quite religious, I felt, like singing hymns and saying prayers, and going on too long. I'm going to post a video of some of this.
The magic man with his alter chanting something for a late relative
I had expected to be eating with the younger generation but as I was already here I stayed with the older lot and am glad I did. One of them was a friendly 88 year old who looked like Deng Xiao Ping - he'd probably have taken that as a compliment but I didn't want to take the chance. The food was nice but I wasn't hungry after the first lunch and I knew there would be another soon. At about 4pm I managed to slip out and drive home to sleep for 45 mins before the next leg.
Very drowsy, I drove back to A Ni's house to pick up some more people to go to the hotel where the actual wedding reception was. The newlyweds had actually officially got married some time ago but that is not celebrated. At the hotel we gave our red envelope containing 500 kuai, which was duly checked and noted in some register. Effectively it is payment plus a bit more for the hotel meal. Well the meal was very nice, but I was too tired to really enjoy it, and as Leilei was getting very tired I took us back around six. Tan told me later that because of the rain it was feared that many people wouldn't turn up, so they ordered 70 fewer meals than originally planned. Then, at 6.30pm everyone they feared wouldn't turn up did so, and there was some panic while trying to sort out food for everyone. It shouldn't have been a problem; our table for six easily had enough food for twelve. Back at home Leilei and I had an early night.
The happy couple
Another lovely meal
No comments:
Post a Comment