Sneaky return for a couple of days after Hanoi

I’d hoped to wangle a few days in Pingguo after a three-day kickoff meeting in Hanoi, but had been requested to stay in Vietnam till Friday, which in the scope of things was hardly torture. I’d booked an afternoon flight meaning I had to leave for the airport straight after lunch. Lunch being with one of my clients. I am by no means at all a foodie, but the food experiences I’ve had in Hanoi have at least allowed me to understand people who are. The stuff you wrap in leaves and dip in a dip were gorgeous, and so different from what I’d ever tasted before. Especially considering I was as far away from Pingguo as Paris is from London. But then the food between these places is probably pretty much as different.

When I arrived in Hanoi a week ago I could only notice the similarities with Guangxi, and given that they neighbour each other it’s not surprising the vegetation is similar. But the differences were the signs in Vietnamese and the amount of people (men) I saw urinating by the sides of the roads. I’m sure it happens in China and in the UK just as much and I probably just had a perchance gawp from my cab but it was my first impression on arrival.

Anyway I had a lovely time in my one night in the Mercure hotel, which I’d chosen as I only needed one night to become a Gold Member...that sounds a little rude. The lovely people on reception congratulated me on this and told me that as a Gold Member I would be able to check out later. I asked if this would apply to my stay and they somewhat sheepishly said they couldn’t put it on the system as I wasn’t yet a Gold Member, but they were human and said of course I could. Take that, “computer says no!”. I immediately felt guilty that I was only staying one night and the rest of the week would be at an Airbnb, and explained and apologised as probably only British people would do. It was 11am and three hours before check-in time but I hoped due to my soon-to-be Gold status they would sort me a room and they did so pronto. Now I’d not slept that much and was tired so what to do? It was almost like writing an equation on the back of an envelope (with the first syllable pronounced “en” rather than “um”). But it was pretty much midday and I knew I wouldn’t be able to stay up till that night, so I justified breaking into the duty free V and having a couple of snifters...and time justified it as by 2pm I was in the arms of Morpheus for a bit. The problem was when I got up at 5pm I was awake till stupid o’clock and ended up forcing a drink at 5am till 6am which didn’t work so I went down for breakfast at 7am, after which I did manage to sleep till 12.30pm. Now the bonus of the late checkout came into effect.

But that was my first day in Vietnam...not much to do with China other than the proximity. Back to the Friday my client, a lovely bloke named Chien, booked me an Uber-like taxi to the airport and told me it would be around 300 Dong. So I said my goodbyes and gave him a hearty handshake and a semi-hug as the tiny car rolled up. It was thankfully not a scary ride and I noticed that wherever you are in Hanoi there seem to be so many white people close by.

Really loved the street food in Hanoi...my last meal...hopefully not my very last...

Of course I was still technically working, and had to attend a meeting in the afternoon. Unfortunately I had quite a few queues to manage until I got past security. But the lounge in Hanoi was lovely. I self-served myself a rather large G&T before dialling in to my meeting and possibly got myself one or two more in the next half an hour. But finally I was free of work. I knew it wouldn’t be easy to get to Pingguo; the last train left before 9pm so I’d have to find a car. So I pinged my neighbour who works in the beauty shop and she gave me the address of a place to go in Nanning where there should be cars going to Pingguo.

Fun watching the planes landing while in a meeting

The 40 minute flight was actually pretty fine...I like to think I’m getting used to flying after virtually 300 flights, but as soon as turbulence sets in I get white knuckles….well not if after a couple of gins. But I arrived at 7.30pm and would have been out of the airport 10 minutes later had it not been for an interview by customs. Ok it wasn’t much of an interview but it was one of those experiences that made me a little proud. The customs bloke asked me if I spoke Mandarin. I was in two minds how to reply; saying “no” would have been easy but maybe wouldn’t have explained why I was only going to be there for three days, so I said “yes, but not perfectly”, which was true, but also could describe a whole range of ability. He asked me where I’d been and what I was planning to do and I explained I’d been working in Vietnam and was planning to spend three days in China as we had a place there and I wanted to see some friends before going back to the UK. It was boringly honest and it was boringly accepted, but I self fist-pumped as it could have been a tripping point...I’ve sort of taken it for granted that I can just visit China but it should never be taken for granted.

By 8pm I was on the airport bus to central Nanning but my bloody phone wasn’t online. I tried in vain to connect to the one-bar (as in bars out of four on the phone, not number of places selling alcohol) airport wifi but from experience resigned myself to the fact that I wouldn’t get online with that. Then I hit on the idea of putting in my English SIM and sending a quick SMS to Li Kun to put in some credit to my Chinese SIM in case that was the problem, which I bloody hoped it was.

I sent the message and swapped back SIMs, then was a bit annoyed at myself for not having hacked my phone with new firmware to allow dual SIMs. Apparently the Mate 10 Pro allows for dual SIM outside of Europe but they stop it by firm/software inside - even the SIM holder clearly has space for two micro SIMs but one is filled in. For a few pence and a lot of time I could easily do this. It’s the latter I don’t have. No sooner had my Chinese SIM connected than I got a call from Li Kun to tell me he’d had to put in 200 kuai to re-enable my line. What a con!

But I was online and my neighbour told me where to tell the taxi driver to go once I’d got off the bus. I flagged one down and 15 minutes later I was in the old north station area and indeed there was a car about to leave for Pingguo. It was one of the few times that a plan seemed to work. Of course it wasn’t that easy. I was told it would be 80 kuai, which I’d expected, and was a lot better than the 300 I’d paid in October for just me. But it meant we were picking up other people, and the next 40 minutes we spent doing that, going to places in Nanning then stopping and waiting and making phone calls until they turned up. Finally, on the outskirts of the city at a tube stop we found the last traveller and we were en route to Pingguo. At least I was in no hurry, and had the chance to speak a bit more Mandarin with the locals.

Although we were going to Pingguo, about 20km before we got off at Long’an, I got concerned and asked what was going on but the driver said something that I didn’t understand and I was too embarrassed to admit I didn’t understand. What happened was that we went through the toll gates, he paid 24.75 kuai, then did a u-turn and carried on to Pingguo, where when we got off it was another 4.75 kuai. Ah, clever - the journey from Nanning to Pingguo direct is 40 kuai so he’d saved over 10 kuai!

We eventually got to Pingguo soon after 11pm. I noticed that where the first bloke got off was rather close to Li Kun’s so I said I would like to do the same and paid the driver his 80 kuai, so he got about 35 quid for 90 minutes driving though he was about 20 mins from home.

Li Kun greeted me without any ceremony as is people’s wont here, and then called a mate to drive to my place to drop off my bags. I first insisted that I pay him back and he accepted the 200 kuai but asked what other currency I had. I nearly offered bitcoin but didn’t think that would go down too well so I showed him a 20 Euro note and he said he’d prefer that even though I told him it wasn’t worth as much. Maybe it was in his friends’ circles. Back home I took a sneaky swig of duty free V then went back down and we drove on to a new place that has not actually opened yet - it looks like a small bar with a stage for musicians and I was worried that I’d be asked to perform.

But I needn’t be worried...there were many of Li Kun’s friends there, some of whom I knew, some of whom apparently I’d met before, and some of whom I didn’t know at all I hope. But a few gan beis meant that we were all friends after a while. It was nice to feel that I wasn’t a stranger, just a non-Pingguo’er but I’ll accept that for the moment. I will look forward to coming back to this place when it’s opened fully...not sure when...but it will happen.

I was flagging by 1.30am and made my excuses. Li Kun was cool and gave me a lift back, I think happy that I’d made the effort to make it over despite the travel. Getting home it was a little weird getting used to the cold. Last month it was still in the high 20s so although no need for the air con it was comfortable. Now, for the first time since 2014 I was experiencing coldness in Pingguo. But fatigue and slight tipsiness meant I found some long pyjamas and put an extra cover on and I found it rather easy to sleep.