Oh no...it was back to 5.30am wake up again. Try as I might I didn’t get back to sleep, even after some Jetpunk quizzes, so after a quick chat with Andge I made the decision to go for a slow jog as I knew I probably wouldn’t regret it. Half an hour and nearly 4k later I did start to almost regret the decision as I slowed to a walk; I just didn’t quite feel up to continuing but forced myself to slow-jog the last 500m.
Some sort of rules for the guangchang that I need to learn
I decided to lunch at Luwen’s place with the kids and we had the only offering they really have: beef with noodles except they differentiate between noodle noodles and rice noodles, at least as far as I understand. As well as not allowing me to pay he also insisted on having a couple of beers. As I’d been awake over seven hours I somehow justified it in my tiredness, then took Xixi to buy some pencils before going home for a well-earned sleep.
Noodly lunch at Luwen's
Then it was up for the usual work routine until guangchang time though only for 30 minutes this time, where I left the kids to themselves. By the time I got back I found Leilei exchanging WeChat details with some girls with skateboards and I was slightly jealous but also a bit proud. This could have been me 20 years ago, minus the skateboard or good looks, oh, and mobile phone.
Leilei adding some contacts
Apparently I’d agreed to meet Uncle Yellow at 9.45 so duly did but I also had an arrangement with Yang Haiwei at 10.30ish at my local bar 3000 Degrees. We only had about four beers, and Haiwei didn’t seem to be his usual self. Then, quite unannounced (though why you would announce this I don’t know), he showed me a video of his elder brother just a few months ago before he died of cancer earlier this year. It was a really harrowing experience as a previously fairly well-built man with whom I’d cai ma’d on various occasions, had turned into but skin and bones and a horrid orange colour. He was sitting up on what was probably his deathbed, smoking a cigarette in what I expected was some intention to make the inevitable come quicker. I couldn’t imagine keeping such a video on my phone let alone seeing it again. I just don’t deal well with such matters. In a sort of attempt to make the situation a bit lighter I mentioned Waipo’s passing a few months ago, but it didn’t really lift the mood. Maybe by showing me he was trying to say something else, or confide something. I may never know but if anything it may have brought us closer together.
When we left he said he’d invite me out tomorrow evening after work, and I thanked him and had another relatively early night.
Got up at 9.30 in good time for the trip to Bangxu, then heard Tan swearing and having a go at Er Jie because her and Lao He were waiting for us in the car downstairs even though yesterday they said they’d wait for Tan to call her. Ha! I’ve had this all my time in Pingguo and I’m surprised she’s surprised. Of course she wanted us all to rush but I needed a shower, even if I didn’t grab a shave. I sorted out my laptop and everything I might need for work as the kids called the lift, but as soon as I got in the car I found I’d forgotten my charging cable and I doubted Bangxu would have a USB-C one. So to Tan’s undelight I said I'd have to go and get it and she said not to go to Bangxu at all then. I disagreed so ran off in the burning 10.15am sun to get my cable and when I rushed back I found Lao He in the shop calmly getting some food for the one hour journey - so much for my rush. And is that the only word in English ending “lmly”?
At least he’s a pretty safe driver, and the drive was a lush view of the Guangxi countryside over the next 70 minutes. Upon arrival it was a matter of walking round various houses over the next 90 minutes or so. I ended up in one house where the occupents were putting stickers on alcohol bottles, then boxing them. I sat down to join in and to my surprise they positively welcomed me to do so. What I thought would be five minutes work was over 45 in the end until we finished labelling and boxing every single bottle, but I was really happy to have helped out.
Arriving in Bangxu
Goats keeping an eye on the cooking
Labelling bottles of alcohol
Leilei helping to set up the remembrance stuff
And Xixi pouring alcohol for dead relatives
For some reason we went for a walk in some water before we ate
Leilei insisted on driving us to the cave
Eventually the time to eat arrived. It was another of those times where I thought we were going for lunch but it ended up being more linner. The food was good and far too copious, as was the drink. I stuck to beer, unlike many of the locals who still hold the local tradition of drinking white alcohol from a bowl, though now sharing from the same bowl is apparently frowned upon due to hygiene reasons. But my teeth were not good. Somehow during the first week or so here the meat has pushed them around a fair bit and it’s quite uncomfortable to eat stuff that’s not that soft. But beer doesn’t cause an issue and a good deal of cai ma ensued, during which I did particularly well and enjoyed talking to the locals including an ex-pilot with whom for some reason I had a conversation about turbulence.
My table for the meal - ex-pilot is in the red opposite
Was a bit more than just a family meal
Cai ma at the family meal
Work was basically out of the equation, and I would have to take a holiday but no regrets as this was quite an important day in terms of the family, and to some extent Waipo’s memory. We left before 5pm and got back to Pingguo at 6, dozing a fair amount of the journey. I could have done with going to bed but the kids really wanted to go to the guangchang to skate and I wasn’t going to impede them so at 8.19pm I took them out. Leilei went back himself for a shower after skateboarding, so I took Xixi to go shopping until most of the shops closed at 10.30, at which time we went for an MMT and then to Huang’s Beihai place for a lovely bite to eat and chat as he wasn’t that pissed or racist. Home finally was a not too late 11.47 where I got Xixi to shower and a few moments later collapsed in bed exhausted.
Tan took the kids to Jiuma’s at 10:30 and with the quiet I got back to sleep and awake at gone midday to see a text saying that the kids were doing the burning of the money for Waipo’s memorial. I was sad and annoyed to have missed it but came over straight after a shower just in time for a meal. I sat at a blokes table and as much as didn’t want it I had to drink beer. I stomached it for an hour before taking the kids back and nearly dozing off for an hour while I lay it off. We were told there was to be a family reunion meal in Bangxu tomorrow and at first I said I couldn’t go due to work but I thought better of it as this could be the last time for a long while and family first etc.
Kids eating at the kids and ladies table
RIP Waipo - now back with your husband
Luwen rang me to say he’d be in his shop with some duck made by his mate that we drank with last night and sure enough 10 minutes later I popped round and there it was. Fortuitously it was teatime so it was fitting for the kids too and we all sat down to eat it before going to the guangchang at 7.30 as promised and Xixi went roller-skating again. We met Er Jie and the bloke Lao He from earlier who I’m guessing is her bloke but not keen on asking, and she confirmed about going to Bangxu tomorrow. Later I checked with Tan what time and she says we’ll be leaving between 10-11am. That sounds rather exact but could mean anything.
Random English words and gobbledegook on Xixi's tee-shirt
One way to get the kids to eat up
I don't know why they can't just write "non-recyclable"
Leilei managed to hop up a curb for the first time
I should have gone to bed early but for some reason I ended up at a KTV place around 11pm for a while and after that couldn't sleep so bought one ETH at 3.30am as if that was some sort of excuse.
A day of work but managed lunch at Luwen’s where he’s still refusing to take any payment, and he told me to come back at 8pm for a drink. That was a little early in terms of work but sod it at 8.30 I took the kids over but they were as bored as one might expect so I let them stay at home at 9.30 as Tan was out. How Luwen can afford the amount of bbq he brought is a question I should have given up trying to ask but I can’t help myself even though I know the answer will not be forthcoming in the near future.
By midnight I was back and tucking in the kids, after which I went for a short ride to see if Huang was about but his restaurant was closed. It’s a far cry from 2008 when I used to go out at 1am and he’d always be there to greet me. Fair enough though he now has a proper restaurant that opens I guess at 5.30pm plus a wife who is now pregnant thanks to the new laws about being able to have two kids. Almost every mother I know here has a second child now or one in the oven.
I thought Tan and the kids might be home by now so after little siesta, at 6pm I looked up some bloke who claimed to be a mate and had pinged me on WeChat a few days before we left London. I had told him I’d contact him when in Pingguo so thought I should be true to my word, so asked him if he had eaten yet as you do. Within a few seconds he’d answered to say he was eating but before I’d finished reading this I saw I was receiving a video call. I was naked but didn’t want to offend him by not answering (or “picking up” as the kids now say - although interestingly picking up is what we used to do with those bakelite phones that these kids have probably never seen the likes of). I managed to tip the phone so only my head was exposed, and he showed me he was with some mates eating and drinking and would show me where so I could come around. I was actually quite grateful as hadn’t eaten more than a portion of jiao zi for lunch, so hopped on the bike to this new area I hadn’t been to before and within minutes was in the mayhem of a bloke meal, with cold red wine thrust upon me (even though on meeting me he recalled I drink beer rather than wine), and then minutes later two women arrived.
To be honest I didn’t recognise anyone, but didn’t tell them. I concluded we’d last met two years ago, and that turned out to be correct, phew. Then the ladies left, and I asked the bloke opposite me why his red wine was a different colour to mine. It turned out it was bilberry alcohol, and he bade me taste it. Well it wasn’t as bad as normal bai jiu is, and I let him know, which turned out in his eyes to mean I wanted a whole glassful, and so he duly poured one full glass.
Then he got a video call from a mate who was in a car - now this one I did somewhat recognise. He was on his way to Pingguo apparently and we had a quick video chat until I told him I couldn’t hear. Then Chen texted to say he was eating and that I should come around, so I said I would in a “while”, which was ok apparently. A short while later I explained I needed to go somewhere, and although this was apparently understood, as I’d finished explaining, the bloke I’d just videocalled from his car turned up with two boxes of beer. Ah...I’d not understood he was turning up in person, and the beers were no doubt for me, so of course I sat down and helped him share them. But of course beer meant cai ma, which for once I did really well at, and of course was video’d so anyone in Pingguo (or Li Jiang) who cares will know.
It wasn’t too hard to make my excuses 20 minutes later, but I had to do a photoshoot with the guys first of all. Back on the bike to the restaurant where Chen was I wondered for the umpteenth time why they don’t ask a little earlier if you want to eat. But I know I shouldn’t - just go with the flow as it’s not like it’s negatively affecting me. The previous meal did not have a great deal I liked, so I was still a little peckish, and this new place had plenty of stuff. I didn’t know anyone other than Chen, but that soon changed after some beers were poured and cai ma started. It was another fun meal, but I had to make my excuses by 9.30pm as the Community Shield was starting at 10, and they seemed to understand.
Lovely meal with Chen
I had a great stream for the first hour, where we played well, but missed most of the rest of the game, including the penalties, but I’ll take that result. Hoping against much hope that Sane will stay as I think he’s become our best player but there’s no space for someone who doesn’t want to be there 100%. Due to the previous meals I only had one beer with the first half and put the other in the freezer to cool down for later. After the match I took the laptop to bed to read the news but for some reason fell asleep soon after 1am.
I got up at a leisurely 9.30, then it sort of turned to 11.30, at which time I turned to work until lunch called. As I didn’t want to waste time I went across the road to Luwen’s but the only “beef” he had was hard offcuts of gristle but I was sort of obliged to eat it anyway, not least because he refuses to charge me anything, but damn it was ghastly and I left most of it. I worked till it was time to go for a massage in an attempt to ease my nerve (literally sciatic nerve). I realised I’d really only eaten two brown eggs all day so when advertising friend invited to go and eat bbq I said I’d happily go a bit later. The massage was actually mostly painful and the woman kept on telling me to relax and as much as I tried I didn’t really succeed - and she kept telling me she was being light.
At least the last few days have seen the rain take the edge off the heat, even if it has made driving the dian dong che a bit harder. But despite the slight impairment to my driving I got to Lao Tong Kao Ji, where last year I had performed, and sitting outside was advertising friend along with five or six friends, who invited me to sit with cheers and arms. I was barely there 10 minutes when the table next to us but indoors bade me come over to have a quick gan bei, and I told my current table I’d be but two minutes. Actually it was closer to 10, not because of too many gan beis, but the three women at the table insisted in taking numerous selfies with me, with the others’ phones providing the light, so it was one of those sitting down with a false smile sessions until it hurt. And of course soon those pics would be shared across Pingguo...well I didn’t try to fight it, I just accept I pretty much have half of my life here beamed up for anyone to see.
I was offered milk, which I abhore, but took it as a gift anyway and hope the kids will like it
I gan bei’d with the guitar doctor (he is a doctor who plays the guitar, not makes them better) then got back to my proper table to the background noise of fairly out-of-tune karaoke and hoped they wouldn’t ask me to go up. Well after a bit they thought about it and as it was getting late I suggested we leave singing to another time when we could plan it accordingly, and they agreed, and I hoped they would forget my suggestion.
Tan and the kids were taking the train to Li Jiang at 10.30 from Pingguo, which meant I was up at 8.30 to see them off, as apparently they need to be at the station an hour beforehand. From my personal experience, at least in Pingguo, you can turn up 20 minutes before your train and do security in 2 minutes but I was not in a mood to argue. I was a bit sad not to be going with them but also aware I’d need to be doing some work and maybe catching up on some socialising.
Sadly I am still keeping track of how many kms I am getting per charge
I skipped breakfast thinking I’d do lunch at Luwen’s as I was by myself, but he was closed for some reason and I realised I’d have to do something new. I found the next closest place and realised they didn’t have what I wanted (dumplings) but felt too embarrassed, as literally no-one else would here, to leave and find somewhere else. So I ordered something, and it wasn’t that bad but rather noodly, and the women at the other table spoke a little English to me. I wish I could change this. It’s not that I don’t like it (I don’t, but that’s my problem), it’s just it is almost without exception that the females less doted with physical beauty speak foreign languages better. And of course it’s not just here, but everywhere. I like to think of myself as being ok (for a Brit) at other languages, but I’d hate to think that meant I was worse looking than I am, but I guess the stats say otherwise.
Work took up the rest of the afternoon and I had no excuse as I was by myself. Yesterday I should have gone to meet Zhang Hua for the first time this year but work and stuff had got in the way. He had joked that he would be in the same place today and I didn’t think he would be but pinged him anyway. He said indeed he was going to the same place at 6pm, so I managed a 10 minute sleep and forced myself to get up to go soon after 6.
I’m really glad I did, and he was happy I came too. There were some football mates of his that came and after 20 minutes we had a full table comprising all blokes plus one woman as is often the case. They didn’t all know each other and the bloke to my left introduced himself as “Peng Dehuai de Peng”, meaning he had the same family name as a famous army general from the past. But that was how I was used to introducing myself. I thought for a moment, and wondered if he was actually introducing me, but by the way he was gan bei’ing with them he clearly wasn’t. So I asked him to repeat his surname, and when I was sure it was him I told him I was also “Peng Dehuai de Peng” and the whole place burst into laughter and applause. This was only the second Peng I’d met in the mainland, and the last was 10 years ago or so. Obviously this called for some sort of celebration, and although I was taking it really slowly on the beer as I had to get back to work, a few more gan bei’s were had to celebrate our mutual surname. I’m trying to think of what an equivalent surname would be in the UK. Something heard of, but definitely not common...like Burley maybe?
Cool meal with Zhang Hua (bottom left in blue) and mates
Anyway I did go pretty easy on the beer but soon after I got home Li Kun called me to say he had my guitar cover and that we were to go to his mate’s camping shop to buy discounted clothes. At least that’s what I understood. Even after 16 years I still find I misunderstand things more than I would like, but as he’d gone to the effort of getting the case I couldn’t not go, despite not having really done enough work. He turned up a few minutes later and I brought my new guitar down to make sure it fitted. It did - snug as a bug. Then I was whisked off, guitar in back of car, to his mate’s camping shop. I performed an in-memory fist pump as I realised I had understood our earlier conversation 100%. Indeed he was having a sale, if indeed there was absolutely no advertising about this fact.
I was a bit worried I’d be “forced” to buy stuff I didn’t want but in fact I found some really good stuff: a tee-shirt that was XXL yet still only just big enough, a pair of perfect zip-off trousers that were so light you barely knew you were wearing them (I’m so gutted I spent 35 quid on a heavy pair from Amazon last month), a pair of the lightest trainers imaginable, and a foldable cap I’d wanted since I saw Li Kun’s last week. All for about 200 kuai, which was a good 70% off the marked prices that I wouldn’t have paid anyway. All in all a good 20 minutes’ buying experience. Li Kun bought much more, and kept saying the prices were “loose change”, which is a very relative concept.
Bargain hunting at the camping shop
Li Kun's charming daughters
Eventually I got back home at 9ish to continue work, until I decided enough was enough; last year I was travelling around the globe and didn’t get much chance to chill, so I took advantage of my base now being Paris instead of London and the extra hour closer and finished at 10pm. I nipped out to get some bbq as a little treat but bumped into two blokes just outside our block. They invited me to eat with them and although my reaction was not to I thought “why not?” and as soon as I sat down one of them went to the fridge and brought out four new “Shuang Pi” Li Quan beer bottles. This was a new one for me and although I was told they were new and expensive I couldn’t tell the difference and they were still 2.8%, so ok for me.
I also found a bit of time to practise Bleecker Street, which has recently become a bit of a favourite of mine
It was very enjoyable to sit with them for 40 minutes or so, partly because of the randomness of it, or rather the unexpectedness. I insisted on actually buying six beers from them just to allow them something back from what they’d given me, and at least they allowed me to pay for them. Back home a minute later I thought I was knackered but still didn’t sleep till 4am...is jetlag still an excuse?
Up at 10ish to the sounds of literally bumping and grinding. Oh no was the A/C broken again? After a few minutes I realised this was not air-con gone wrong but the unmistakeable sounds of next doors doing up their house, and in this case it sounded like next doors were upstairs, not something we’d consider next doors in the UK. Well I suppose there is nothing I could do about it...possibly people had already moved in below us when we started doing the same thing 10 years ago. But it could go on all summer...lordy.
So earlier than expected, and before Tan got the chance to order crappy DFC, I took the kids to eat yumi tang and egg-fried rice. To my shame we’ve ordered the same meal here for two years solid, but at least they mostly finish it and it’s sort of healthy. And it’s always the same 30 kuai so we know it’s basically 3.50 for eating out decently at the cost of a dian dong che ride in the searing sun that we’ll actually miss in one month.
But on the way back it was the hottest it’s been for a good while...there were few people on the streets in vehicles without shade or A/C, and when we stopped at red lights to turn left and found out it would be 80 seconds till we could I was a bit naughty and turned a sharper left to mount the pavement and get home that way just to avoid the sun. The kids appreciated it although I told them there had to be a good reason to break rules.
But there was to be no siesta; the kids were too awake and Xixi had showed interest in the guitar, and given we now had two, I said we should go and find new strings to replace the old ones that must be around three years old now and sound horrid. It was more a journey to be with the kids; I knew we’d find somewhere eventually, and after some stopping in shade we found a music shop on the corner of a road not too far from home, but they wanted 35 kuai for a set. Of course I wasn’t going to argue but had I known I could have bought a better set from home over: note - next year bring guitar strings over.
While we were out we also got a replacement phone cover for Xixi’s phone for 15 kuai, and got a quote for a replacement battery for 80 kuai, which in retrospect we should have gone for as the current one is bulging...having said that the last non-official one we got in London bulged so much as to deform her last phone….
Uncle Yellow texted me in the evening to see if I was free. I then found out it was him yesterday texting me, not Li Kun - I felt like a right tit when I realised I’d sent him a photo of my new guitar yesterday attestifying my love for it, thinking I was writing to Li Kun. Anyway I was free and needed to be there at 6.30. Xixi was out with Tan so I took Leilei and met up with Boss Zhou and then various other people turned up during the course of the meal. I took Leilei back after 8 as he was rather bored then somehow came back and continued eating and drinking till gone 1am. Two of the women there, it turned out, were after foreign husbands, around 50 years old! So exact...I told them I’d look out for them and they genuinely seemed appreciative! Jeepers I hope they don’t hold me to it.
Uncle Yellow and Boss Zhou - really good mates
The cat that was a kitten last year has really become quite sassy
Got back at nearly 3am after a very enjoyable night meeting new people and after having made sure the kids were asleep. Hope to get a lie-in tomorrow.
Up at 10.30 wondering if that is enough sleep to go without an wu shui. However, it appeared that we had all been invited to one of Tan’s ex-colleagues at 1.30 who lives just a little south of Pingguo.... Haiwei also called to invite me for an evening meal and said he’d call back at 5pm with the details, so no likelihood of an wu shui then.
But 1.30 turned to 2pm and we got to the house nearer half past. I started to doubt we were having lunch and my fears were confirmed when I was told we were to drink tea with some more ex-colleagues. I should have guessed it wasn’t going to be lunch - no-one arranges lunch at 1.30 or later. So I texted Haiwei and gave him the honest reason I wouldn’t be available at 5 and he seemed to understand - I’d ping him when I could.
We picked what I thought was a massive pear but apparently it was "just" a grapefruit
I went out for a walk by myself and found a place where I bought some little meaty snacks as I hadn’t eaten all day, before the heat forced me back to find shade. They were busy cooking upstairs and it seems I wasn’t the only hungry one as others were picking on the rooster balls before we finally sat down to eat at 4pm, which if this was an evening meal was rather early - linner? Lupper?
One of three transformers I met on my walk
I suppose it was a mini-reunion meal and there were around 10 of us and wine was forced upon me as apparently there was no beer. After an hour or so it typical style more people arrived and others dropped off. Then a bloke arrived with a box of beer so I had something more palatable to sip on, except sipping wasn’t an option.
For the first time ever I found a sauna in Pingguo - what? The whole place is basically a sauna 80% of the year
Waiting for the meal to be ready from outside the sauna
One of multiple plates of rooster balls, or would it be more appropriate to say cockerel balls?
It was a lovely meal though, especially the company
I had explained my prior engagement with a friend at 5pm and they said they’d take me there “very soon”. As it was of course I was obliged to participate in multiple gan bei’s before they let me leave and some non-drinking bloke gave me a lift to where he was at 6.30. It wasn’t his own house, and it wasn’t his mother’s house, but his wife and younger son were there so it must have been legit. Haiwei made me talk to his older son to come around and speak English but for some reason he was adamant that he wouldn’t come. I didn’t quite get the reason and although slightly happy I didn’t have to speak English, was also slightly concerned. Anyway, Li Kun called me to say my tee-shirt from yesterday’s picture was ready so I went home with an excuse and picked up Xixi to go there in the dian dong che to pick it up with her. I didn’t mention it looked rather like a New Zealand top. I appreciated it but had to leave to be with the kids for the evening.
Later, Li Kun IM’d me to see if I had time to meet up but I was still with the kids so had to decline, but I sent him that picture of my new guitar and told him I loved it! I did make the effort to meet a friend to drink tea though to counteract the beer, and afterwards I was really tempted to go for another massage but I soberly realised it was rather late and should get back. That didn’t stop me chatting with Awl till 4am though….
