Meal with Huang Lei and the kids and unfortunate leakage afterwards at bbq by the river

Yes, I finally managed to get up soon after 8am, after waking up at 4am for the loo. I managed a coffee and forced myself to the gym at 10.30am and did more leg exercises and finally managed what the elliptical said was 10km in 33 minutes. I totally doubt that but I took a picture anyway for Strava. Maybe I should have had some breakfast before as my legs were rather wobbly and I needed to sit down for a while and finish off my water until I felt strong enough to walk down the stairs to the outside to stumble home.

I'd love to trust the 10km but I only really trust the 33 minutes

I went out to eat jiaozi then when back Tan asked me to get some noodles from the place "opposite". "Opposite what?" was a question I wanted to ask but would have somehow ended up in an argument for a reason that is Chinese, and I was just supposed to know. "Opposite" would to me have meant opposite the main gate. But it could also mean on the other side of Chenglong Road, so I tried that first as I could see a couple of places that were open. But I needed to get "酸汤肉末" and the place I went to didn't have that. So I went to the other opposite place and nothing was open. So I crossed to where I saw stuff open and found a place that sold it. All she needed to have said was "diagonally opposite" and it would have been fine. Then she texted me to get "肉末玉米包、肉末粉丝包" for the kids at the bun place by our house. But that place was sold out of everything as they were a breakfast place, but then Tan told me to go to "爱上包" which is just two doors away from where I got her noodles. It would have been so much easier to be clear in the first place, but hey, at least I got the right stuff in the end.

After lunch was boring clothes drying time, made less boring by listening to "I, Partridge" on Youtube and partaking in a single guiltless beer, justified by wanting something fizzy and not sweet. And it didn't result in another one, at least not for a couple of hours. I realised I hadn't seen Huang Lei for nearly three weeks so pinged him to see what he was up to. He had time this evening so we arranged to meet up. He said he'd go out and buy some food first, but I responded that it was me who had been in contact with him so I should pay. Of course he refused, saying I could do it "next time".

So I popped to Guanmart to get more dragon fruit for Tan and shampoo for Xixi (which cost 69 kuai) and more tissues as you can never have too many tissues. Tan said her body was still aching from yesterday so wouldn't go, but the kids agreed to go for a bit at least. So at gone 6pm we left on the bikes to Huang Lei's friend's place about 8 minutes away, to find them still cooking, but within 15 minutes the food was being served. Xiao Chong and younger son were there too, followed later but elder son and a mate. Leilei ate a bowl of rice and some chicken and beef, whereas Xixi ate only a bowl of rice and made little effort to converse, so I let them go soon after 7pm. At least they'd turned up.

I thought this was an alcohol shop too before realising we were on the first floor and this wasn't an ideal place to be showing your wares. It turned out that the owner just liked collecting bottles of booze and he certainly had an impressive display. He had gone to open a large box of wine bottles but Huang Lei was drinking baijiu and knew I'd be on beer so he told him not to open any wine. But the owner said he only had about 12 cans of beer in the fridge. I said that would be more than enough and I would go downstairs and find more, but of course they wouldn't let me.

At least a couple of the other blokes joined me in beer instead of baijiu and after a can or so each the owner brought a bottle of 11° Li Quan (or 4% in English), and I said thanks, we'd finish this bottle then go back to the 8° (2.5%) stuff. He agreed but then went on to open another 11° Li Quan. What's worse was that the caima had already started. Then he brought over a couple of German imported wheat (or maybe white) beer at 5.5%. I believed it was imported not because it said so on the can but because there was no mention of ° on the can, but he said it was 15° and I was in no mind to disagree. But I let him open it as I understood he wanted to show off a little and it's not like I wouldn't have done the same. But after sharing two cans of the stuff and not doing brilliantly at caima I was quite happy to move back to the 8° stuff.

Then, as is so normal here, a bloke turned up and delivered five cases of beer. They don't do things by halves here I know, but they don't do things by ones either; they do things but 2.5s to 3s by my reckoning. I told the owner I hoped he didn't expect us to drink all that tonight and he gave the rather obvious answer that it would last "a number" of days. That's a fair, non-committal answer I appreciated.

I'd brought an unwanted bottle of 公文包 with me, but of course they had their own and I asked how strong it was. Of course it was 22°. After over 20 years I've still not got to the bottom of this. Why is it ok to call beer 8° when it's 2.5-2.8% instead of using %, when you say 22° for 22% baijiu (or 53° for 53% baijiu)? What about wine? Ah...that'll get them. Most of the wine is imported and unlikely to have ° so they'll probably say 13° to mean 13%...in that case I'll pull out a strong beer that they say is 15° and ask them which is the stronger one. That ought to make them see the error of their ways. Or they won't care, as they instinctively know which version of ° they're using and maybe I'm just being a bit anal about it. I'll ask Li Kun as he'll give me the closest thing to a logical answer here.

As we were in a private house it was ok for Huang Lei to indulge in caima too, and of course I had to do this with everyone. A Hoc turned up with a "girlfriend of a friend"...hmmm...whereas I might ask detailed questions about ° I wasn't going to ask too much about why you'd turn up with someone else's girlfriend without the someone else on tow. Maybe it was totally innocent, and she seemed in good spirits. Well both did as they'd been drinking, and the woman then engaged in caima with me for a longer time than was necessary, but I gave as good as I got.

A Hoc, a friend's girlfriend, some bloke and a great meal

Huang Lei's youngest got really fractious and wouldn't eat, preferring to scream, so eventually Xiao Chong took him back, and then around 10pm we called it a night as Huang Lei had to get his eldest back in a didi che. So I pinged a friend whose name I've either forgotten or never knew and they sent me a dingwei for a bbq place down by the river where I'd been before.

So 10 minutes later I was at a table with them chatting and drinking and then playing mopai. I somehow managed to win most of the time which meant I didn't get much more tipsy, and had a good time until I realised my tummy was complaining about something. I calculated that it would be too risky to attempt the 8 minute drive home for a proper toilet and made a beeline to the disgusting effort they had here. The bag of tissues only had three of them left in it but I calculated I didn't even have time to go outside to find some more, so would have to be very efficient in the rear-wiping department. Well although that department worked out ok (I barely needed the third), the front department was the victim of a bit of a mis-shoot, as I'd been focusing on the rear and hadn't had the time to remove my trousers completely as I normally do.

Well this could be embarrassing. At least my trousers were light beige linen, but they wouldn't dry while I was in the toilet. There was nothing for it. I ensured my pink shirt was covering as much as possible and skulked back to the table outside hoping nobody had noticed. I'm not sure whether they would have said anything had they noticed. I mean they're quite frank here, and will let you know if you've got fatter or thinner or are not as good-looking as last time (I've had the first two but thankfully not the latter). In fact this year most people I've seen have said I haven't changed in years, and I'm not talking about clothes (although to be honest some clothes here in China I have had for years so in theory they could mean that to some extent).

I didn't want to go to the loo again and risk people seeing my significant patch, so not that much later at midnight I said I'd better leave, and no-one tried too hard to make me stay, other than a couple of ganbeis. Gosh, I so hope no-one noticed as I quickly turned around and headed downstairs to get the dian dong che back.

Annoyingly there was nowhere to charge up, but in terms of priorities I needed to remove my clothes first, and thankfully I was back before Tan so she was none the wiser when she got back an hour later (yes I think post 1am) and woke me up to offer me bbq. I said thank you but later, and promptly went back to sleep.